Tuesday, March 31, 2009

The Carlson Funnies

I am practicing my silhouettes. Thanks Mom for letting me jump into this one. (Note to self: start doing your hair just in case someone offers to take a picture. Cute hair is a must for a silhouette.)


Now that was not a very funny story....so here are a few that made us laugh.

The other day I had to call customer service....for something, I can't recall. In the middle of my conversation I get to a point where I have to spell something out...because I'm a mumbler. Well this was the kind of call where they want you to say "A as in apple..." So I'm spelling my word and I get stuck on "p". I'm trying to think of an appropriate word that starts with "p". The only two words running through my head are "pee pee" and "poopie". (I need to get out more.) I am scrambling for any other P word and I'm getting no help from the other end. So I blurt out "P as in poop." Somehow I thought that was better than poopie.



We are at a restaurant waiting for a table. Max and I are having an innocent conversation about where his eyes, nose and ears are. Then I ask where his belly button is and he says "In pants." (No complete sentences yet.) I say, "No, you're belly button is on your tummy." And Gwen blurts out, "Max has a weiner!" Now that happens to everyone, right? I still thought it was a little funny so I had to tell my mom and sister when we saw them later that day and then of course I had to tell my brother when he go there. I forget that even when Gwen doesn't seem to be paying attention... she is. So I reinforced in her 4 year old head that she had done something hilarious. So fast forward a few days. Gwen has apparently been waiting for me to recreate our conversation and when it doesn't happen, she takes matters into her own hands. This time we are at church and everyone around us is being very reverant. Gwen says to Max, "Where's your belly button buddy?" Max says, "In pants." Gwen laughs and says, "No, that's your weenie in there." Then my sweet little 2 year old says, "Mama has weenie!" I do not in fact have a weenie. But everyone around us thought it was pretty funny.


I have been getting a little worried about having to talk to my curious little 4 year old about things of a curious nature. The other night Joey brings Gwen in to me fresh from a bath and tells me that it is time for me to give her a little talk about private body parts. Gwen gets a look of utter excitement on her face and climbs up next to me. As I am thinking about how to best approach the subject, Gwen says, "Mom...Dad said you need to talk to me about flying body hearts!" While I am laughing my head off, she looks at me again and says, "Well...let's talk about flying body hearts." The funniest part was that I think she did indeed heart him correctly. I think she thought maybe I had misheard and she could steer the conversation in a less awkward direction.

11 comments:

Sarah said...

I love being the first to comment. Love the pictures, we need some new family pictures done, hint hint. I still haven't found prices on sports pictures. If you have any ideas, let me know.

Crystal said...

I always answer Daisy's questions about flying body hearts. Steve hates and it and wishes I wouldn't be so blunt - so Gwen can just talk to Daisy about said hearts :)

Jennie said...

Nice one, passing the duties onto other 4-year olds. I don't know what my kids fascination is with flying body hearts lately. Jameson said to Paige the other day, "Paige, when you grow up, you'll have a wee-wee like me!" And then we told him that would not be happening and she got all upset. "I not gonna have a wee-wee?!?" I read somewhere that we're supposed to used anatomically correct language when talking to our kids. I just can't bring myself to teach my babies the "p" word...

Elaine Goold said...

Oh, too funny! Sarah is gonna hate me for this one, but when she was 4, I had the flying body hearts talk with her and she went to Primary and somehow in her little class the topic was on chickens and eggs. It was probably Easter. Sarah thought this was the appropriate time to tell the flying body hearts talk to her teacher and little buddies. The Primary teacher called me to chew me out and tell me that I had given the talk way too early and Sarah knew way too much. This woman did not have any children of her own, and actually never did have any. But I digress - Luckily I only had two little girls and made Gary give the talk to the 5 boys. Who knows what he said!!! I'm not even sure he knows anything about flying body hearts!

cara lou said...

Haha. Love the "poop" story. I think that would have been the first word to come to mind to me, too.

Loriannie said...

Melissa was so upset in 3rd or 4th grade when an older girl told her about a monthly egg. Melissa thought she was going to have to lay an actual egg and sit on it for it to hatch.(sorry melissa)
Seriously though, Gwen isn't too young for a basic talk that includes Heavenly Father. I nominate Grandma Patty!

The Johnsons said...

You sure do have the funniest conversations. Those conversations dont happen when you have 2 little girls.
To answer your question about California, yes we had a blast. It wasn't that warm when we went I would go in the Spring time just wait for a little warmer weather. Paeton is 3 almost 4 in Aug. I'm not sure how she compares to Max but she is 40 inc and could ride almost all the big rides except a like 3 rides. Only a few are 46 in and 48 in. Which made it fun so we could all ride together. I think your kids would love it. I would definetly go when he is tall enough to ride rides with you too so you can have a mixture of kiddie land and your rides too.

Nat said...

Ha ha ha! So so funny!

Oh, and remember the comment you left on my blog about my...umm...deep sleeper?

The last two months, Clint and I have been waking him up at night. Some nights it worked, and some nights it didn't. We never had one night where he was awake after we "woke" him up. There have been several times we have said, "remember when we got you up last night to go potty?" Nope. Absolutely nothing. I know he doesn't do it intentionally and that he isn't lazy. I was just wondering if there was a more effective way to deal with it. Waking him up doesn't seem to be working because he doesn't remember waking up, and he still doesn't wake up when he has to go. So, will he just grow out of it when he is ready?

NatPalmer said...

I tried to teach Logan the proper name for his boy parts, but he still calls it a "wee-wee." When he figured out there are both boys & girls in the world (even though never seeing a naked girl), instead of describing people as a boy or girl, he was obsessed with telling me who did or didn't have wee-wee's. "Daddy has a wee-wee. Carson has a wee-wee. Nana doesn't have a wee-wee." and then he'd always ask me if I had a wee-wee. I was a little insulted that he couldn't figure that out on his own & had to ask! Luckily that phase didn't last too long. :)

A little bit of our history - said...

Well Suzy you arent the only one thats had these things happen. Except the "P" for poop thing. That literally had me laughing out loud! I used to work for jetBlue and we would do that on the phone.

Oh and on the body parts thing we have been there a while back. Savannah popped the whole "where do people come from" question and then "Where do babies get made" I used to call body parts for girls a Virginia and for boys a Pennsylvania when I was little. Dont ask why.

SevenVillageIdiarts said...

I really already love those kids of yours that I've never met, and I was stalking your brother on his FB and saw the answers Joey put on one of his "notes" and I cracked up and I really can't wait to meet Joey either. It's gonna be a fun summer, Suzy and Fam on the adgenda.